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How I almost choked a guy at WalMart

In most instances, I am a very calm and collected individual. However, there are certain things/situations that get me all worked into a tizzy. I had one of these instances at WalMart.

Ok, so refrain from telling me how awful I am for the following: when I shop at the store, I place my handbag in the kid’s seat.


*GASP!* HOW COULD YOU!?!? THAT IS SO DANGEROUS AND IRRESPONSIBLE!!! Ok, are you over it yet? Lets move on.

Anyway…like I said: when I shop, I place my handbag in the kid’s seat. I have NEVER had an issue with this. Trust me when I say that I NEVER stray from my cart, and usually my hand is ON the bag in some way. Perhaps I feel a false sense of security based upon the suburban, nice area that I live in. I haven’t really heard of many purse-snatching incidents in our local stores…just saying.

So, on this particular day I had made my rounds through the WalMart aisles and was proceeding to the check out. I got in line, and when the conveyor belt emptied enough for me to start loading, I changed my position from behind the cart to the side of the cart. I repeat: to the SIDE of the cart…not even to the front. My hand was on the child seat area, but not on my bag. At that point, I started to unload the contents of my cart onto the conveyor.

It was at this moment that the gentleman in line behind me felt the need to get involved in my business.

As I’m innocently minding my p’s and q’s and preparing myself for the checkout process, the man in line behind me starts clearing his throat. I look up from my cart at him and smile…because I’m friendly like that.

He looks right at me and says, “If I were you…” and then proceeds to walk around his cart, PICK UP MY HANDBAG,  zip it closed, and place it back in the cart…NOT in the kid’s seat, but in the main basket.


Ummmm…what?!?! I’m pretty sure that my jaw had hit the floor after this man’s extremely bold (and extremely rude) move. I shook my head for a second, thinking I’d just shrug it off. Ordinarily, I would never say something back to this type of person, but this just cooked my grits. Seriously dude, you have the cohones to physically pick up a woman’s handbag out of her cart?!?! Unreal. Anyway, in a beautiful, divine moment of confidence, I looked back at that awful human being and quipped:

“Well, if I were YOU, I’d mind my own business.”

Thank you. Thank you very much. And yes, if you were wondering…it did give me a fleeting moment of satisfaction. But, I’m still angry about the entire scenario.


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  • Oh, i would’ve been LIVID! I always keep my purse in the child’s seat, too, but my mom actually gave me a useful tip that I use EVERY time now. Take the child strap thingy and wrap it around the handles of your handbag and clasp it closed. That way, if anyone does end up grabbing your bag they’ll end up pulling the whole basket and cause a ruckus, and by that time people will notice and The Stupid Handbag Stealer won’t have time to unhook the latch. Just an idea for the future!

  • I do the same thing as Jessica (when I remember). Good for you for making the guy look like an idiot! I hate people that can’t just mind their own business!

  • You had your very own OMG Mom moment! Too bad you couldn’t take a pic (probably would have been a tad obvious.) But seriously, what is WRONG with people?? I’m so glad you spoke up. That would have probably rendered me speechless (something that rarely happens.)

    Favorite phrase: “This just cooked my grits.” Florida really has it’s own language, huh?

  • Wow. maybe he was just looking out for you, but i ALWAYS put my purse in the kid carrier area and keep a strap under my hand when I’m pushing. Like putting it underneath my eggs and bread and fruit is going to keep it safer? Weird.

  • I think the only thing I would’ve changed would be to say, “If I were you, I’d keep my thoughts AND HANDS to myself!” Good for you actually voicing that. Really, it’s not anyone’s business where you keep your things. I keep my purse in the child’s seat, too – usually unstrapped. Is there a “like” button on this thing? 😉

  • I do this too, with my purse. But what’s funny is that people are ALWAYS up in your business about it (and all sorts of other habits) around here…I take it they aren’t where you live? Here it’s like everyone treats you like their family even when they’re perfect strangers. They’ll tell you they think your tire is too low, they’ll tell you you’re buying a brand of food that they don’t think is as good as another brand, they’ll tell you when they don’t think you have enough veggies in your cart. If you buy prenatal vitamins, they’ll ask if you’re pregnant or trying to get pregnant, then give their advice on that process (even if you say NO!). NUTSO. So I’m kind of used to it. I still really hate people up in my personal business though – I’ve just been acclimated to living in a place where everyone simply is. Heh.

  • The U always makes me use the child safety belt to lock my purse into that same section of the cart and zip it. It’s so annoying, but probably smart. I, however, would have been just as floored if a random stranger did that same thing to me!

  • Perhaps it’s the area I live in but I never thought twice about leaving my purse in the child’s seat. I didn’t even think to put the straps threw it or anything… I will now though. (Although I rarely use a cart instead of the basket or my super HUGE re-usable bag).
    Good for you for saying something to him, it is NONE of his business and people need to learn to mind their own.

  • I don’t mind someone offering their advice… I had a little old lady tell me that once. I just shrug it off. (Unless I’m in a bad mood then I glare at them.)

    But TOUCHING your bag??????? I would have grabbed something of his or something else awkward like that. And good for you for saying something.

    I didn’t know about the child strap thing. I like it!

  • holy cow! I would’ve never known how to react.

    I always place my purse in the child seat. SOMETIMES, I buckle it in around the straps. That way, at least no one can simply grab it…I’ll notice!

  • Why isn’t anyone mentioning that the man was actually concerned enough to even mention the purse is easy pickings in a store.

    Maybe his wife had his money stolen at a store prior to this?

    I agree he should not have touched it. That was rude.

    You are lucky that he didn’t send the same message by stealing your purse while you were busy with the checkout.

    As a man, I can safely carry any document or items to go shopping in my pockets of my clothing. A man bag is not so acceptable to society, at least in my community. I would be a target for store security. I contend womens purses are used for most items lifted (Shop Lifters) from retail stores.

    I hope you reconsider the message the man was making, not how he delivered it.

    • Thanks for your comment William. I think no one mentioned what you brought up because I had already stated the fact that I know people would tell me that I shouldn’t put my bag in the kid’s seat. However, I also find it extremely cumbersome to carry a large handbag on my shoulder while shopping – it makes it very hard to reach up/down to items on shelves. It just isn’t efficient. Also – as all of the previous commenters are also women, I think they might understand what I’m saying/how I feel about having my bag picked up and removed from my cart. Again, as I said in my post: 99% of the time my hand is actually ON the bag in some way, and I never walk away from the cart. My back was never turned away from my bag for a second.

      Also, I really hope that you aren’t insinuating that I would be shoplifting because my bag was large/unzipped. I would never shoplift. Ever.

  • I would be hot too! I think you handled it well. He probably THOUGHT he was being helpful but…well… my own HUSBAND will not even touch my handbag unless I expressly tell him to. And even then he’s hesitant!

  • Oh, wait – I’ve heard you tell this story before. Maybe on the WB boards? I remember that – I would’ve thanked him for his concern and then told him off for touching a personal item.

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